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What I Really Want from You, Dad

December 04, 20233 min read

Hey Dad,

I know we don't always see eye to eye, and there are days when it seems like I'm living on a different planet. You might wonder what goes on in my head or what I truly need from you. Even though I might not say it out loud, there are a few things I wish you knew.

Consistency - Life's pretty wild right now. Everything's changing: me, my friends, even the world. Sometimes, it feels like I'm on a rollercoaster that won't stop. That's why your consistency is crucial. Knowing I can count on you, no matter how stormy it gets, gives me something solid to hold onto. It might seem like I'm pushing you away or that I don't care, but deep down, I'm really looking for that stability you bring.

Grace - I'm going to mess up. A lot. And sometimes, it'll be the same mistake, over and over. I know it's frustrating, and I might act like I don't care, but your grace means everything. It teaches me about forgiveness and shows me it's okay to be imperfect. I need that room to grow and learn, even if it's the hard way.

Truth - This one's tricky. I'm trying to figure out who I am and what I stand for, and I could really use your honesty. Not just the "do as I say" stuff, but the real, hard truths about life, about mistakes, about everything. I might roll my eyes or seem indifferent, but your words stick with me. They help me navigate my own path and learn from someone who's been there.

Friendship - I know, it sounds weird. Why would I want to be friends with my dad? But here's the thing: I do. Not in the "let's hang out all the time" way, but in the "I know I can talk to you about anything" way. I need to know you've got my back, that you're here to listen, even if you don't have all the answers. It's about feeling safe enough to be myself, to share the good, the bad, and the ugly, without fear of judgment.

I might not act like I need these things from you, and I probably won't thank you for them now. But trust me, in the future, I'll look back and be incredibly grateful for the dad who showed me consistency, grace, truth, and friendship. These are the gifts that will help me become not just a better adult, but a better person.

So, thanks, Dad. Even when I don't say it, I appreciate you more than you know.

Your Teen

Looking back, the consistency, grace, truth, and friendship my parents showed me were things I didn't think much about then, but now, I see how crucial they were after leaving home.

These principles are straightforward but critical in helping your teen manage the challenges of growing up in a busy world.

When I started college and got advice from mentors, I realized they were echoing what my dad had already taught me. I was just too stubborn to listen before. The efforts you put in now, even when it feels tough to keep going, will pay off later. They lay the groundwork for how your teen will view and approach fatherhood in the future. Keep leading by example.

Thanks for reading

Will Kubicek

Co-founder, Six Summers

Intentional Parenting Father sonGrace
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